Donna Matthews

Category: Live, Love, Learn

  • Today’s Installment of Life on the Train

    Today's Installment of Life on the Train.

  • Is a Number Just a Number?

    When it comes to ages and milestones I have only struggled with my 28th prior to this one that is. Strangely, I am 48, turning 49 in the summer. I had forgotten about my 28th year and how difficult I found it. I guess the only good thing was that by the time I hit 29 I was over my growing older crisis. Now at 48 I find myself in a similar situation. This time however, my worries and I suppose fears, are not centred around what I have not yet achieved but on the things I don’t want to change or lose.

    I have finally found my place in the world and that only came with finding my one true love. I know how lucky I am to have found this love and I appreciate the fact that so many people never will. But this is also the root of my rediscovered fear of turning another year older and another year closer to the next milestone age.

    I have a beautiful family that is quite large now due mainly to my two lovely and prolific brothers as well as my fantastic step children. I want to take a snapshot of my life right now and then say “this is where I want to stay, right here, right now.” Because I have never been more safe, more loved or more content than I am at this very moment. If it is not possible to stay here then at least slow the clock down, make every minute last a bit longer. Let me enjoy every moment with these people who are my life. My gorgeous Pamela who captured my heart over a pub lunch. My grandma who is well into her 9th decade spanning two centuries. My parents who taught me how to love and still show me be example every day. My brothers, who will always be “the boys”. My eldest brother and his pride of having kids in 4 different decades and two different centuries! My step “kids”, their partners and our granddaughters. Also my 10 month old Labrador. Now maybe you can understand my hesitation in taking this next step along the road to 50. I know for some this will seem old already but for others you will be thinking ” only 50…I wish!”

    Wherever you are along your road I hope you take a snapshot too and look at where you are, what you have achieved and appreciate every moment. If you are not yet at that perfect place in your life and you are struggling to achieve just remember, as one of my new favourite lines in a movie goes, “it will all turn out in the end and if it doesn’t turn out then it is not yet the end.”

  • Pam and Donna’s big move…take two!

    Oh yes, you do remember correctly, Pam and I recently moved (well September), but we just moved again today. We truly hope this will be the last time as we are no longer renting! The day started bright and early (Oh, I forgot we are in England in the winter) the day started dark and rainy and Pam dropped me at the train station at 06:00. I was off to work in Coventry while she went home to wait for the movers. The morning did not really go according to plan for either of us. I missed my connection and arrived at work two hours late and the movers were over an hour late to start the move. This wasn’t looking good. However, the rest of the day went much better. Pam finally sat down for 5 minutes at around 19:00 (6 p.m.). and I made it through my day and to the hotel about the same time. Now Pam is in our new home alone tonight as I’m away and so is Tess until tomorrow. The reinforcements arrive tomorrow afternoon in the form of our dear friends Ann and Helen. Not only have they been looking after Tess since Sunday but they are coming to help Pam with the mountain of unpacking. Now, I have said to Pam that once we are in to take her time unpacking, there is no rush. Any of you who know Pam that is the most unlikely scenario ever. I will not be surprised if Home and Garden are not taking pictures of the place by the time I get home on Thursday!

  • Week 2

    IMG_1419Week 2 and I changed accommodation and what a good decision. Not only do they have proper cutlery but it is a pub with real ale, WiFi, great food and they are dog friendly!  The picture is the view from my room. Oh yes, we have more snow. I think when I asked you all to wish for snow on the 13th, for our anniversary, that you did such a good job that it is still snowing. Our temps have not been above freezing since!  The power of collective thought.

    Back to the new job, people are starting to figure out that I like to enjoy work which means making jokes during meetings, the requirement for sweets and chocolate at any meeting booked for an hour or more and some of the guys I worked at other places reminded me yesterday that they are waiting for Pam to start baking!  Shortbread and cakes have been requested.

  • A New Beginning

    It has been a long time since my last post and so much has happened during that time. The pain from my Fibromyalgia went off the charts for several months. It took a massive toll on my job and my life. Pam has been my rock getting me through every day and on many days that was our only goal. Then we made a decision that was very risky but felt right. We decided that I should change my job, the job I loved but also the job that my body could no longer support. It was time for a change.

    In August we moved back to Swindon (the place that feels most like home to both of us), we went on our long awaited holiday in Rhodes and then returned ready for the big challenge. My employer was wonderful and fully supported my decision to leave the company in order to find a role that I could not only sustain but one that would be good for my career. I spent the month of November applying for and interviewing for jobs. I set myself a target to get not just any job but the right job by the time we left for Christmas on December 21st.

    All the agents told me that for someone at my level and with the salary I wanted it would take around 4months on average to get the right job. That might have been the average but I don’t think I’ve ever fallen into that category before so why start now. On December 20th, one day before flying to the US for Christmas I had two job offers! I made my choice that day and could fly to Texas knowing I had a great job to return to. Even Pam who has all the faith in me thought I was being overly optimistic. Somehow it worked out just fine.

    Tomorrow I start my new journey as my new job starts at 8:00 a.m. sharp. I feel like a kid on her first day at school, my stomach could secure a spot in Cirque Du Soleil with the acrobatics it is currently performing. I think this will be a terrific opportunity for me and I am ready to make the most of it! While I am away from home during the week (my job is in Coventry which is about 85 miles from home), Pam is busy packing for our move. Yes, I did say move even though we just moved in August we now have another move before the end of January. This one however we hope will be our last move. We are moving into the house on Garsington on the 28th of January…the house we are buying.

    This evening Pam and Tess dropped me off at my hotel for my big day tomorrow. Now they are home and I’m here and today is our 3rd anniversary. Pam and I met 3 years ago today in a snow storm and guess what? It is supposed to snow tonight for he first time all winter! How cool is that?

    I’ll let you all know how I get on tomorrow, in the meantime make a little wish for snow tonight?

  • New start…

    I have not been posting very often over the last few weeks due to my Fibro pain being so overwhelming.  I pretty much bottomed out last week and needed to do something to get the wild beast that is my pain back into some kind of cage.  So, I went to the doc and we made a small change to one of my meds and then Pam and I joined a spa to go swimming.  We have now been 4 times in 5 days and I cannot believe the difference.  The wild beast began to calm after the first visit.  After 4 it is back in its cage and I plan to throw away the key.  Not only is the pain back to a very manageable level I actually have energy to spare.  Swimming for about 45 minutes and that is not stopping after every length.  That is interspersing lengths with exercises.  Then it is the whirlpool for 10 minutes or so.  Amazing!  Last week things were so bleak that I just couldn’t see the end to this dip.  Now I’m on my way out of the dip heading for the top of the peak and I will do everything in my power to stay there.  I want to say that I would not have been able to do this alone.  Pam as ever is my coach, my support and my friend.  She never wavers, she is steadfast and that is what helps me get through the rough times.  It is back to work on Monday and I’m ready to go!

  • What a difference the sun makes…

    Yesterday was drizzly and nasty outside and it seemed to encourage me to wallow a bit in the pain.  This morning the sun was shining and immediately it lifted my spirits.  We decided to make the most of the day and went to a local car boot sale and then for a nice walk around the nearby country park’s lake.  It wasn’t a very long walk but it was light years away from sitting on my couch and feeling sorry for myself.  The park was full of people letting their dogs off the leashes for a well deserved run.  The tea shop was doing a booming business and it was just a lovely place to be.  Today is a completely different day.  The pain still sucks but it is easier to deal with.  It must be said that I did not do any of this on my own.  If it wasn’t for my phenomenal partner Pam I would still be sitting on the couch!

  • Leicester v Bath and there is no TV coverage!!!

    I just checked my Sky Planner to ensure that my rugby was all set up for tomorrow’s last game of the season between Leicester and Bath…what do I find?  Nothing.  So, I start to search the listing and find Northampton v Worcester and Newcastle v Wasps but no Leicester match.  Thinking that this can’t possibly be correct what were the schedule makers thinking when they planned this?  I kept searching then found a tweet confirming this disastrous news. No telly for the last regular season game.  I’m still in shock!  Tomorrow at 2:00 I’ll be absolutely bereft.

  • Soggy Sunday

    It is another rainy and windy day here, this week we have  seen our local rivers, streams and brooks on the verge of bursting from all of the rushing runoff from the rain.  I know we are officially in a drought but when you wake up to the sound of the whipping wind and lashing rain you don’t much think about hose pipe bans and water shortages.  So, what are some things you can do on a soggy Sunday like this?  My mom, (whose birthday it is today, Happy Birthday Mom!), loves to do what she calls “doing bear”. Doing bear, consists of puling the covers way up as if you are in a cave and snuggling down to listen to the rain outside feeling all warm and safe in your cave.  Not a bad way to spend a day like today.

     

  • Ugh, flat packed furniture!

    My greatest nemesis…flat packed furniture and for someone who lacks spacial aptitude yet has the confidence to adopt the motto, “if all else fails read the instructions” you can see where this is a very bad mixture.  So yesterday when we could no longer put off opening the giant box in our bedroom containing my new and not very expensive desk, it was time to face my foe.  Now, Pam and I are very different people, she is my balance.  Where I will put together first and ask questions later when the door handles are upside down, Pam will study the instructions, lay out all of the components and then tackle the beast head on.  This was actually our first piece of flat packed furniture that we have bought together so I was going to turn over a new leaf and do it the right way. I took out all of the bits, sorted them and opened the dreaded instructions.  I made it to step two before calling in the reinforcements who was cooking dinner at the time.  Together we battled through steps 2 and 3 before my lovely and gentle partner announced that she was going to through the runners for the drawers through our bedroom window.  She took a break at this point.  I soldiered on not willing to be defeated by a couple of pieces of metal with little plastic wheels on them.  I completed building the first drawer with great triumph.  Now, time for the second drawer I look back at the instructions (now that I’m using them I cannot do anything without their guidance and I see that the next step takes  you on to something different.  Here I am one drawer complete and now I’m stranded.  The instructions did not even say anything like “repeat last step for 2nd drawer” or “okay fly solo on the 2nd drawer”…nothing just on to the next step.  Not to be outdone I used my first drawer as a guide and completed the second one.  Once the drawers were built and the runners put on (which was the worst part by far) the next few steps went swimmingly.  Pam came in very surprised to see the shape of a desk and no pieces outside our window.  Together we put the top on and were now ready to just pop the drawers in and we were done.  Okay, you know those runners that I was so proud I had conquered? Well, the left drawer went in but will not come out more than 3 inches and the right drawer will not even go in!!  Pam says “no problem we don’t need the drawers so we can just leave them out.”  One issuette here…the left drawer physically won’t leave its little cosy space.  It is there and it is staying.  We left it last night before the entire thing ended up outside, saying that we would sort it tomorrow.  Pam appeared confident saying “what goes in must come out”.  When I got up I tried to extricate the drawer to no avail.  Keeping my failed attempt to myself I will let the master do her stuff when she comes home.  At the moment though we don’t have a desk but a table with one drawer that only opens 3 inches!  Who the Hell ever thought selling furniture in this manner was a good idea?  Come to think of it maybe selling it was a brilliant idea it is the stupid people like me who buy the stuff knowing we will not get it to look anything like the picture on the box that are making them rich!